13 Weeks

Amazing what a night's sleep will do. This morning I felt much better, and was excited that baby is at 13 weeks today. Sometimes I imagine I feel baby moving around, but I know that it can't be. I can't wait to feel those little flutters and movements.

When I sing Ethan's bedtime song, I am singing to baby too. I imagine myself singing to baby as baby nurses or falls asleep. I remember when I did for Ethan, and in those early days when my hormones were still crazy I would always sing with tears in my eyes. Such intense love. I already feel such intense love for this little one.

I can't help but start the countdown in my head. 3 more weeks till 16 weeks which is when my placental abruption started last time. I am so paranoid about doing anything which might bring it on, although I know there is nothing I can do. After all, Ethan was just fine in there through the intimacy, the swimming, the exercise. Losing a baby can bring on the paranoia so quickly though. I just have to try to stay on top of those negative thoughts. Not so easy sometimes...

Instead of thinking of Julia today, I was thinking of Ethan and when he was born. I think my mind needed some of those happy thoughts and I enjoyed thinking of him today. :)

I love all my children and am cautiously awaiting the arrival of my third. How many weeks...27 more till full term. I'm just taking time day by day, although time seems to be flying by fast enough. It will give me more time to enjoy my new little one growing in my belly. :) Perhaps that is one thing I have learned...to slow down, not take anything for granted and enjoy the little things.